On Motherhood: Life, Love, and the Pursuit of Happiness

On this date, eleven years ago, I had my last baby. During my pregnancy, I was adamant that I wanted a girl because my husband already had two boys, and I wanted to give him a girl. God saw fit to make him a boy and that was the end of it.

I’m glad now. My relationship with my daughter, now 18, has been a volatile and rocky one. I know it’s very typical that girls compete with their moms over everything, but having an alphabet behind your name and surviving all that she has does things to a person.

God knew exactly what I needed. This tiny little guy has been a momma’s boy since conception. He wasn’t the smallest of my babies, but he is the last. There’s just something between a mom and a son that just happens differently between them. It’s not that we love our daughters less or our sons more. It’s just… different. 

For me, after years of the abuse I endure having a child like my daughter, then adding my two stepsons (who came with their own set of issues and problems), this little boy is the calm in the storm.

He’s already so much different than his siblings. Yes, he benefits from our growth as parents, but he also has a different personality. Maybe it’s because he is 7 years younger than the rest, born in the late 2000’s, a different generation. Maybe it’s because he had the advantage of having his momma home 24/7. Maybe it’s just him.

I like to think it’s a combination of the latter. All I know is this boy is the sweetest of the sweet. He’ll share his last crumb with you. He’ll stop what he’s doing to comfort you. He’s always ready to give a hug or a pat on the back. He got more energy that I know what to do with, but he’s learning how to work it out on his own. He loves his football, xbox, and movies. He loves Hot Wheels, wrestling, and sleepovers. He still wants to be a police officer/SWAT when he grows up.

That smile, those dimples. His unending thirst for love and knowledge…

He loves with his big heart in the only way he knows how: unconditionally.

Happy Birthday, my little one. I’m glad you aren’t in a hurry to grow up. I’d keep you exactly as you are for a while longer.

Love, Momma


The motley crew
Bittersweet #motherhood post today as my youngest turns 11. #writerslife #blogging Click To Tweet

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